Evil Parents

So I was watching TV last night and a commercial came on for a gospel music collection. One of the artists advertised, and I'm not making this up, was a guy by the name of Richard Smallwood. Seriously. What kind of butthole parents did this guy have? "Yeah, let's name our kid Dick Smallwood! Sweet!"

The Most Unintentionally Funny Letter Ever

Here is a letter to the editor that appeared in a recent Salt Lake Tribune. It is hilarious. It goes by the simple title of "Unfair to Bush". Enjoy.

Why wait for a "verdict" on the Bush administration? It was positive.

Yes, the initial military intelligence on Iraq was faulty, but it convinced all parties. With weapons of mass destruction, do we take any chances? The administration acted boldly and persisted to the end to protect the homeland. Spreading freedom abroad includes keeping oil in the right hands.

Mistakes were made, but consider that Abraham Lincoln's Civil War did not go well at times. And George Washington lost more battles than he won and only a minority supported the Revolutionary War. Like them, George W. Bush had to deal with political problems, an unpopular war and apathy. Just because something is unpopular does not necessarily mean it is wrong.

Bush restored dignity to the office.

Charles Penrose
Bountiful

The parade of delusion on display here is both astounding and amusing. Let's hit a few of the funnier moments.

• Charles points out that Bush just wanted to "protect the homeland." I guess he didn't feel up to it when he ignored the intelligence warning him of 9/11. Or when he rolled back environmental regulations that might at the least protect Americans from toxins in the air and water, and at the extreme help prevent both coasts from being flooded out, displacing millions. Of course, as New Orleans proved, Bush IS a big fan of major American cities being flooded.
  
• Charles has determined all parties were convinced Iraq was a threat. Certainly if I was not convinced, then all parties were not. See also: Dennis Kucinich, the UN, most of Europe.
• Charles insists that we spread "freedom by keeping oil in the right hands." First of all, what in the hell does oil have to do with freedom? Also, why the assumption that all the world's natural resources belong to America? Gotta love that "God bless 'merica, and f@#$ everyone else" attitude.
• Charles then compares Bush/the Iraq war to Abe Lincoln/the Civil War and Washington/the Revolution. Really? I propose we start a fund to buy this guy a history book and a newspaper.
• Charles asserts that Bush faced "political problems." Such as? Having a Congress ruled by his party and sans backbone that rubber-stamped everything Bush sent their way? Perhaps he means the numerous scandals that plagued his presidency, like torture or rolling back civil rights via the patriot act or turning the executive branch into a near-dictatorship, etc. etc. etc. Funny, those all seem to stem from Bush himself; no one forced him to be evil.
• Charles states that "just because something is unpopular does not necessarily mean it is wrong." This is true. But Bush's war (and Bush himself) are unpopular BECAUSE they are wrong. Most people like the President to follow American law (which includes int'l treaties signed by the United States) and the American Constitution. Funny how we're sticklers like that.
  
• Finally, Charles decides that George W. Bush restored dignity to the Presidency. Enough said.