Just got off of work and decided to pick up some Subway from the drive-thru on the way home. They have a very tasty chicken sandwich for $5 that I always get and was ordering when I had this exchange with Captain Dumbass, henceforth known as "Subway Joe":
Subway Joe-"Would you like mustard on that?"
Me-"No mustard. Can I just get mayo and sweet onion?"
Simple enough. He moved on, I moved on. I paid and got my sandwich and drove home. I then open up the sandwich and what do I see? Mustard slathered over everything! And no mayo or sweet onion sauce! He also forgot the spinach that I had ordered, even though he had written it down on his little order sheet. Yes, the one that was inexplicably stuffed inside the sandwich and also slathered in mustard. Speaking of mustard, to quote Todd Barry, "Have you ever eaten this shit? It tastes like garbage." Seriously, how do people eat mustard? Nasty. Anyway, congrats to Subway Joe for being able to breathe, as he is obviously not capable of much else...
I have recently trying to re-backup some stuff from my old college computer (basically condensing the tons of backup CDs I burned onto DVDs) and I came across an old video that I hadn't seen in ages, but is, as the Aquabats would say, "serious awesomeness!"
Good old Bad Religion. On a side note, in looking for a copy of this video online, I found out that they are recording a live "album" of sorts that they will be sending out for free if you join their mailing list at badreligion.com.
Anywho, that got me thinking of old videos that I hadn't seen in a while, and then up comes "Peppyrock" by BTK on itunes. This video has some many great old-school Sesame Street references, my favorite being the B-Boy "one of these things is not like the other". This video also makes me miss Muchmusic to an insane degree. For the uninformed, Muchmusic is basically Canadian MTV, except they play music (so maybe Canadian MTV circa-1990). Good stuff. Anyway, here's the video for that:
On a related note, here's an old Sesame Street moment. They don't quite make them like this anymore; can you imagine a pseudo-drug dealer on a kid's show today???
Which brings me to my favorite music video of all-time. So incredibly, amazingly, and wonderfully stupid! If you don't already know what one it is, I won't spoil it, but I will give you a hint: it involves fruit and ninjas. It's also not available for embedding so follow this here link!
In addition to all the video goodness, I realized that I promised (months ago) to get a top albums of 2009 list together. I also realized that it hadn't happened yet. So with a little thought and plenty of half-assedness, here's my picks:
Honorable mention: Lady Sovereign - Jigsaw Weird, wacky beats and presentation are the hook here. Lady Sov is as odd as ever, but I think the music has improved. She's also added some songs that are oddly confessional, for her and for rap in general. And a sample of the Cure's "Close To Me"? Good stuff. Matt and Kim - Grand Wikipedia lists them as "dance punk". I'd call them more "electro indie" (yes, I did just make that up). Either way, this is a fun album that I have enjoyed a LOT more than I expected. If you watch "Community", and you should, it has gotten excellent, you may remember this one. While you're at it, check out a cover someone made with Mario Paint, holy crap!
Runner-Up: Flight of the Conchords - I Told You I Was Freaky Great album. This was close to getting up to number one, but a couple "meh" moments drag it down (notably "Demon Woman" and especially "Fashion is Danger"). Oddly, I liked the first season of the show more, but enjoyed the album of the second season more. And when the songs here are good, they are REALLY good. "Hurt Feelings" (home of the classic line, 'I feel like a prize asshole/no one even mentions my casserole') and "Sugalumps" are both amazing. And then, of course, there is the all time classic "Too Many Dicks (on the Dance Floor)". AMAZING. And where else would you hear 'Too many dicks/too many dongs/too many schlongs/now sing this song'? FOTC singlehandedly make New Zealand awesome.
Best Album of 2009: Fight Like Apes - You Filled His Head With Fluffy Clouds and Jolly Ranchers. What Did You Think Was Going to Happen?/...And The Mystery of the Golden Medallion First of all, before I get into anything, these guys are incredible. Go here right now and download their free concert mp3s and then mosey over to amazon where you can get their full album for $7 in mp3. Now with that out of the way, a little explanation as to how two titles take the top spot. "You Filled His Head..." is actually a sampler EP for the US market (FLA is Irish) that, despite what amazon says, was released here prior to the full album. It is mainly cuts from ATMotGM with an extra song or two. ATMotGM was actually released overseas in 2008, but seeing as how I'm not overseas, I am going by the American release, which was well into '09. With explanations out of the way, let's discuss the music. It's wild and (at times) sloppy and random and punky and dancey and filthy and funny and catchy, as well as sugar and spice and everything nice (or is that girls?). They categorize themselves as "karate rock", which is about as good a description as any. I could try and single out some songs, but they are all great. Some of my current favs include "Something Global" ('hooks are for wimps/and choruses for gays' is right up there with the FOTC line), "Do You Karate?" (unfortunately the lyrics are edited in this video, but what can you do?), and the wonderful "I'm Beginning To Think You Prefer Beverly Hills 90210 To Me" ('you're fired/SUPLEX! SUPLEX! SUPLEX, BACKBREAKER!', genius.). Although Bret and Jemaine put forth a valiant effort, MayKay and the boys from Fight Like Apes just plain put out a classic album. Honestly, they are by far the best band I have discovered in YEARS, and oddly enough, I discovered them when they were mentioned in a small blurb on the wikipedia homepage. Who knew that that was the place to find new music? Congrats, Fight Like Apes!
Finally, in closing, I'd like to present you with something completely unrelated that will become your new favorite thing to say post-defecation: "Boy, that's a load off my anus!"
Here's some random things that I have found entertaining on recent journeys across the arid landscape known as internet:
Todd at work sent this one my way; it's a 50s "educational" film about the dangers of homosexuals...
Note the fantastic "Leave It To Beaver" music, also found in the companion video "Girls Beware" in which young women find out that all men are serial rapists/murderers. Thanks, 1950s!
These led me to the next educational film (in 2 parts), all about girls and "the curse". I sure learned a lot this day!
Do you have a spare $1 million laying around? Neither do I! But if I did, I might look into this, which is one of those things that is so utterly pointless, but so unbelievably awesome...
As I listened to yet another politician argue for federal dollars to bail out American citizens, I grew angry. I refer to Gov. Gary Herbert's call for the U.S. Forest Service to cover firefighting costs associated with the Mill Flats fire ("Guv criticizes fire policies," Tribune, Aug. 31). The Forest Service's policy of letting the fires burn on federal lands is sound fiscal policy, for fighting fires merely consumes limited tax dollars that could be returned to us taxpayers.
Why should my taxes go to cover private residences built near wildlands where lightning fires are likely to occur? After all, these people are free to find market-based insurance to cover their needs.
Where in the Constitution does it say that fighting wildland fires is my responsibility? It's not my house or structures that are in danger, but those of people who clearly chose to live a lifestyle close to wildlands. I know that having a residence near wildlands makes the insurance more expensive for the owners, but that merely reflects free-market costs. It is reprehensible and un-American that they should ask that I cover their needs -- another indication of our increasing creep toward socialism.
Obviously with the fact that I have a job that pays me well below the poverty level and that we have a new car already, I am certainly NOT in the market for a new car (plus, my current car is awesome). That being said, it is still fun to look, so here's some new cars I would be looking at IF I were in the market for one. And yes, I'm keeping this fairly realistic, otherwise, why wouldn't you go for the Lambo or something right? Also, keep in mind that I haven't driven any of these (and have only even sat in the Scion), but am going off of styling and things I have read/heard about them.
Honorable mention: 2009 Honda Fit Sport It would have made the list, but there are two strikes against it. One, I don't like the styling on the new Fits as much as the previous ones. And two, we already have an 08 Fit, so obviously, I would probably prefer another car (as much as I love the Fit, and I do! Great car, HIGHLY recommended!). The Fit is go!
4: 2009 Scion xD (as I configured it: $18,151) After Scion killed the amazingly awesome original xB (yes, the box car) and the cool xA, I was very sad. In fact, I'm still sad, the new xB is horrifically ugly. Poor, poor decision Scion/Toyota. Anyway, the replacement for the xA, the xD, while not perfect, is a nice car. There are a few unfortunate design flaws, however, keeping it from higher on the list, two in particular that stick out at the moment. One is the unfortunate massive blind spot created by that area behind the back side window. The other is that you have to pay over $150 to add the center armrest "option." Ridiculous. Even with the flaws, however, it's still a pretty sweet car that easily makes the list.
3: 2010 Kia SoulSport (configured to $18,775) There's a Kia dealership near where I work and every time I go to get gas in the work vans I drive by and see these out of the street showing off. Really funky, but still cool styling. Some of the color combinations are really odd, but somehow they pull it off. Plus, Kia is one of those makers that offer the 10 year/100,000 mile powertrain and 5 year/60,000 mile basic warranty, which would be very, very nice.
2: 2010 Honda Insight EX (configured to $22,109) This is probably the only one on the list that is a bit of a stretch for me, but I'd still look into one if I were in the market. And in actuality, I would probably configure it a bit differently to cut some costs if I were really looking. As much as I like the Prius, they are a bit rich for my blood, while the Insight brings a hybrid a bit closer to my price range. Plus, my experience with Honda has been excellent, both with our Fit, which has given us 0 trouble, and with Willey Honda, who I can't recommend enough if you are looking into buying a car.
1: 2009 Nissan Cube 1.8SL ($18,150 as configured. I'm a sucker for the interior illumination kits!) Ah yes, the next best thing to the old Scion xB. I've actually looked at this one up close when I saw one at Costco, and it is as awesome as in pictures! The rear wrap around window is super cool, I can't think of another car I've seen with anything like it! Plus, it is priced decently to boot! If I were given 20 grand and told to go buy a car right this second, well, this would be my new car for sure! So just take a minute and soak in the awesome...
After wanting to buy this game for ages and ages, I finally broke down on my birthday (on which Tori also got me Dragon Quest 5 [sweet!], which I will delve into after I finish Chrono Trigger, but I digress) and got it. Such a good decision. Anyone who grew up on the NES will be instantly at home with this. I'm honestly having a hard time pulling myself away from it, and it has reminded me how much I miss the old 2d games. If you have a DS, I can't recommend this one highly enough!
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