Thursday, January 29, 2009

The Most Unintentionally Funny Letter Ever

Here is a letter to the editor that appeared in a recent Salt Lake Tribune. It is hilarious. It goes by the simple title of "Unfair to Bush". Enjoy.

Why wait for a "verdict" on the Bush administration? It was positive.

Yes, the initial military intelligence on Iraq was faulty, but it convinced all parties. With weapons of mass destruction, do we take any chances? The administration acted boldly and persisted to the end to protect the homeland. Spreading freedom abroad includes keeping oil in the right hands.

Mistakes were made, but consider that Abraham Lincoln's Civil War did not go well at times. And George Washington lost more battles than he won and only a minority supported the Revolutionary War. Like them, George W. Bush had to deal with political problems, an unpopular war and apathy. Just because something is unpopular does not necessarily mean it is wrong.

Bush restored dignity to the office.

Charles Penrose
Bountiful

The parade of delusion on display here is both astounding and amusing. Let's hit a few of the funnier moments.
  • Charles points out that Bush just wanted to "protect the homeland." I guess he didn't feel up to it when he ignored the intelligence warning him of 9/11. Or when he rolled back environmental regulations that might at the least protect Americans from toxins in the air and water, and at the extreme help prevent both coasts from being flooded out, displacing millions. Of course, as New Orleans proved, Bush IS a big fan of major American cities being flooded.
  • Charles has determined all parties were convinced Iraq was a threat. Certainly if I was not convinced, then all parties were not. See also: Dennis Kucinich, the UN, most of Europe.
  • Charles insists that we spread "freedom by keeping oil in the right hands." First of all, what in the hell does oil have to do with freedom? Also, why the assumption that all the world's natural resources belong to America? Gotta love that "God bless 'merica, and f@#$ everyone else" attitude.
  • Charles then compares Bush/the Iraq war to Abe Lincoln/the Civil War and Washington/the Revolution. Really? I propose we start a fund to buy this guy a history book and a newspaper.
  • Charles asserts that Bush faced "political problems." Such as? Having a Congress ruled by his party and sans backbone that rubber-stamped everything Bush sent their way? Perhaps he means the numerous scandals that plagued his presidency, like torture or rolling back civil rights via the patriot act or turning the executive branch into a near-dictatorship, etc. etc. etc. Funny, those all seem to stem from Bush himself; no one forced him to be evil.
  • Charles states that "just because something is unpopular does not necessarily mean it is wrong." This is true. But Bush's war (and Bush himself) are unpopular BECAUSE they are wrong. Most people like the President to follow American law (which includes int'l treaties signed by the United States) and the American Constitution. Funny how we're sticklers like that.
  • Finally, Charles decides that George W. Bush restored dignity to the Presidency. Enough said.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

90s Boy

A friend of mine and his sister like to occasionally call me "90s Boy", mainly because of my totally-grunged-out plaid jackets I like to wear, but also because of a lot of the music I listen to and expressions I use.

Well, I completely lived up to that moniker tonight. After playing some sweet N64 (and dominating Spam at Goldeneye), I got on iTunes and found a link to the '90s One Hit Wonder Collection'. After reminiscing about nearly all of the songs and rocking out to the sample of "Lucas With The Lid Off" (damn, that's a good song), I went ahead and finally bought "Fade Into You" by Mazzy Star. I'm now on my second consecutive playthrough of it. And with that, 90s Boy is out.

Monday, January 5, 2009

Uber Pwnage

The next wave in crime: Nerd Graffiti! Yes, I really saw this in a local Best Buy parking lot.

Sometimes life is awesome in weird, wonderful ways...

Clarification

In my last post I mentioned that "(t)he next BYU fan that mentions the '84 team to me as BYU's supposed superiority over Utah is getting punched in the face". What I meant to say was, "Since 99% of BYU fans are the most ill-informed and obnoxious in all of sports, the next one to mention BYU to me is getting punched in the face". Sorry for any misunderstanding.

Saturday, January 3, 2009

Utes #1

The BCS is crap. The Utes will finish the season as the ONLY undefeated team. They should be national champs. In fact, they have a better record against BCS top 25 teams than does Florida (3-0 vs. 2-1). They destroyed an Alabama team that was #1 for much of the year. They are the #1 team, despite what anyone or any system tells you.

What makes this even worse is the fact that BYU fans STILL go on about their 1984 national championship team (a team that would more than likely get destroyed by not only this year's Utes, but the '04 edition as well, but I digress). If the 80s system were still in place Utah would be the definitive 2008 champs AND more than likely would have done it with a much easier bowl matchup. The next BYU fan that mentions the '84 team to me as BYU's supposed superiority over Utah is getting punched in the face.

In other words, death to the BCS!

Friday, January 2, 2009

First Post

Happy Joy Boy welcomes you to my new blog and stuff...


HI!!!